Wedding Speeches
Advice from a photographer who has seen it all
I’ve been that photographer who has made a point to tell someone when their speech has knocked me out of the park. Noah and I have photographed over three hundred weddings in our career, probably more, I don’t know the exact number, Noah probably does though! We’ve heard many, many toasts and speeches and words of love during the wedding day.
And I won’t lie, there are some speeches we have chosen to forget and some that I wish I could hear all over again. My brother-in-law had the honor of giving a speech this past year and I was honored when he asked us if we had any tips. I was a little surprised at how ready I was to give my answer, and probably should have toned down my passion but that’s just not who I am. To know that he gave a great toast, and that a tiny piece of my advice helped him write and deliver an authentic speech for his very best friend is awesome!
So I’m here to share with you, that little bit of insight! Thanks for reading!
Introducing Yourself
If you are starting your speech with “for those of you who don’t know me” … STOP! Just please for the love of all things stop. There may be people who don’t know you but you can introduce yourself a heck of a lot better then how everyone else does after they’ve gone on google to figure out how to write a speech. Think about your speech as a story, paint the picture of you and this person, so that the audience can feel that you’re there for a reason.
“As the sister of the bride I am honored to stand here today and gush over how incredibly beautiful she is as a woman and in that dress!” Points for being sentimental and complimentary without it seeming like a line on a to do list in telling the bride she’s beautiful.
“As the sister of the groom I have never seen him look more handsome than today when he married the love of his life.”
“Other than today, the best day of my brothers life was when I was born…” Points for funny!
“College orientation changed my life because that’s when I met the bride. The next four years were really the Jules and Sarah love story, and now I release my dearest friend to the other true love of her life.”
Jules, what else goes in the speech?
After your intro, you should keep the story telling aspect going and here are a few things NOT to do:
Don’t spout off a list of qualities of your friend, take time to write a natural prose about who they are as a person.
For example, “my sister has always been the one I call when I need advice or when I have absolutely nothing to talk about. There is no one in the world who has made me almost pee my pants from laughter as much as her, and I know that James feels the same cause now I have to race him to the bathroom! It doesn’t have to be about peeing your pants, that’s just the first thing that came to mind when thinking of my funny sister, these are just examples, you make them your own!
Do NOT, for any reason, talk about previous relationships. Don’t even think about it, there is no circumstance that does not make this awkward for everyone . . . especially YOU. You can have the best speech around but all they will remember is that you talked about an ex.
K.I.S.S.
Keep it short & simple! Ten seconds may be too short, but ten minutes is too long. You want to get in there, get there attention and get out before anyone checks their watch or sneaks a peek at the score of the game. (It happens, trust me.)
Write it by hand, type it, read it out loud, to yourself and then to someone else. If you’re stumbling over the wording, then it’s too forced. Make it sound like a conversation, one that you haven’t had to look up words in the dictionary for.
And this might go without saying, but have fun, be intentional and breathe!
